The Notorious B.I.G. - Ready To Die (September 13, 1994)

The overrated rapper Canibus once said, "The greatest rapper of all time died on March 9th". Ten years ago to this day, actually, and Christopher Wallace can still safely be considered one of the greats, with little to no argument. Gunned down during the heat of the "east coast/west coast" beef, Biggie was never truly able to create the catalog of music that would define his legacy.

It's too bad that a certain somebody feels otherwise, repeatedly raping his corpse by releasing sub-par albums chock-a-block full with collaborations with rappers that Biggie probably would never have worked with otherwise. I haven't seen this level of incompetence in the handling of a legend since Pac died, and I don't think Pac was even a good rapper in the truest sense. (His songs had more emotion than you could shake a stick at, though.)

Ready To Die was the debut album from the upstart Notorious B.I.G. The second release on Puff Daddy's Bad Boy Records label (the first being Craig Mack's Project: Funk Da World, an overall exercise in futility, albeit with one or two hits), Biggie would soon become Bad Boy Records, epitomizing the lavish lifestyle of a successful rapper (at least right until he was usurped by his boss). Rumors of Biggie getting fucked over with his publishing aside, Ready To Die accomplished a lot for being just one album; it introduced an artist who did not disappoint, it turned its record label into a household name; it turned the white kids in the suburbs who actually buy all the hip hop records on to a rapper who was at ease with both the club-friendly jams and the gangster shit; and, ultimately, it led to this.

As it stands, Ready To Die is one of only two albums that Christopher Wallace participated in recording, and is the only one to be released while he was still around to celebrate the success.

1. INTRO
Hey, I never said there wasn't an intro to this fucker.

2. THINGS DONE CHANGED
An interesting first song, but not great.

3. GIMME THE LOOT
Biggie does a back-and-forth with a high-pitched version of himself, advising (in both hilarious and controversial detail) would-be victims to run their jewels and garments. (The controversial stuff was eventually edited out before the album's release, but it's not hard to figure out what he really said.)

4. MACHINE GUN FUNK
Not horrible, but I'm still waiting for that next shit.

5. WARNING
Contains one of the best first lines in hip hop history: "Who the fuck is this?". Simply a great song about a rich man's overall paranoia regarding his so-called "friends". The video is even pretty good, especially for one shot that sums up the whole song: Biggie eating cereal (with the brand names hilariously hidden) at his table. Even though he has his riches, his bitches, and his producer pretending that he's a trained actor in the video, ultimately, he was all alone.

6. READY TO DIE
Title tracks, as a rule, usually suck. This one doesn't.

7. ONE MORE CHANCE
The album version is much, much better (and much filthier) than both the hip hop remix (bad name for a remix, by the way) and the slow-jam mix that Ashanti would later rape and pillage...sorry, I mean "sample".

8. FUCK ME (INTERLUDE)
Um...notable, as it's Lil' Kim who is faking the orgasm? (Or maybe Biggie fucked her in the booth, I don't know, and I don't care.)

9. THE WHAT (FEAT METHOD MAN)
This was a huge, huge collabo back in the day, especially since Biggie had beef with the Wu. Method Man was his old-school grimy ass self, and Biggie more than held his own.

10. JUICY
The single that introduced Biggie to the masses. Also the song where he talks about "blow[ing] up like the World Trade", for those who also read the Jay-Z review earlier.

11. EVERYDAY STRUGGLE
Not bad, but...

12. ME & MY BITCH
Story Time with Christopher Wallace, and he pulls it off like a charm.

13. BIG POPPA
You already heard this one; my opinion won't matter anyway. (Okay, since you asked; it's all right, but I'd rather listen to the Isley Brothers' "Between The Sheets" any day of the week.)

14. RESPECT (FEAT DIANA KING)
Every good album has to have one clunker. I present exhibit A.

15. FRIEND OF MINE
Meh.

16. UNBELIEVABLE
DJ Premier supplies the bangin' beat to one of the best songs in the Biggie catalog. This song is just ghetto like sunflower seeds and quarter waters.

17. SUICIDAL THOUGHTS
I thought this song was amazing when I first heard it, especially the part at the end where he kills himself and Puff freaks out. Hell, I even wrote about this song for an English paper once. (Got an A, if anyone gives a fuck.) Still an awesome piece of work.

In 2004, Bad Boy Records celebrated the ten-year anniversary of Ready To Die's platinum success by releasing a remastered edition with a DVD and two bonus tracks:

WHO SHOT YA?

This song is just epic. Internet nerds also believe that Biggie was taking a pot shot at 2Pac's recent shooting, but internet nerds are dead wrong here.

JUST PLAYING (DREAMS)
This had been out for a while on mixtapes; it's better known as "Dreams of Fucking An R&B Bitch". And it sounds exactly like it reads: delicious. C'mon, like you've never fantasized about sleeping with celebrities before? All Biggie did was record his thoughts on wax.

In 2006. Bad Boy Records lost a court battle stemming over the illegal Isley Brothers sample on the title track, and was forced to pull the original from the shelves...after it had already been available for twelve years. Smart move, Isleys. Anyway, Puff quietly re-released the remastered edition with a slightly different version of "Ready To Die" included. I have no idea what the "new" version sounds like, though, since I still have my original copy from 1994.

FINAL THOUGHTS: Ready To Die is probably one of the best debut albums in the history of hip hop, and I say that even though I fully admit that some of the songs are shitty. Oddly, everyone always calls out Puff Daddy as Biggie's producer, and I suppose in an executive producer capacity that makes sense, but as in producing the instrumentals? Puff's name is rarely found here. Talents like Primo and Easy Mo Bee (who doesn't really work anymore, and that's a damn shame) contribute that gutter shit that assisted in taking hip hop back from Dr. Dre's G-Funk soundscapes.

BUY OR BURN? Oh, come on. Buy this shit. Buy it! BUY IT! You can even choose between the original and remastered version, as either one is worth the benjamins. Although if you spend one hundred dollars on this CD, you might be getting ripped off.

BEST TRACKS: "Warning"; "Suicidal Thoughts"; "Unbelievable"; "The What"

-Max

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