Diversionary Tactics: Max's Commentary On The Billboard Hot Rap Singles Charts (Week Ending March 23, 2013)

The last time I wrote specifically about the Hot Rap Singles chart featured in Billboard magazine was nearly five freaking years ago, when the artists written about included Lil Wayne, Shawty Lo, Rick Ross, Flo Rida, and something called a Webbie.  So what better day than today to revisit the charts and see if anything has changed?  (SPOILER ALERT: Lil Wayne is still a fixture.)

Yes, in my quest to do everything except attempting to complete my self-imposed project, I apparently plan on reviving some long-dormant HHID tropes, starting with today's post (because my last article about XXL's list didn't really count).  Does this mean that I plan on bringing back the Drink Coaster write-ups?  Probably not, but if one is looking to see what is wrong (and, admittedly, what may be right) with today's artists, this might be a good place to start.

Diversionary Tactics: Ten Artists Ski Beatz Should Track Down For The Inevitable Fourth Semester Of His 24 Hour Karate School

A few of you have already noted this in your comments for the Ski Beatz 24 Hour Karate School projects, but for the rest of us: the quality of the music (and the artwork, although the album cover for the third installment, 24 Hour Karate School Presents Twilight, wasn't that bad) has decreased with each successive installment (24 Hour Karate School Japan doesn't count, since it included the same beats from the first installment of this series, just adopted by entirely different artists).  It's a known fact that Ski abandoned the hip hop tradition of overt sampling after the first installment, electing to utilize a live band (The Senseis) as a cheaper alternative, but that isn't why I feel the music has suffered; The Roots have used a live band nearly their entire career, and they sound just fine.  Although I do feel that the man's work ethic may have resulted in some rushed product that could have used a little more nurturing before it was unleashed upon the public, I believe that the fault of the glorified art project's failure lies with the artists who pass through the building.

Ever since Yasiin Bey Mos Def pulled out of the original 24 Hour Karate School seemingly hours before the album hit store shelves (after recording several guest verses, he refused to allow them to appear on the project itself), Ski Beatz has been very selective about the rappers he will allow into his dojo.  Unfortunately, he has pretty much excluded every single major name in hip hop today in favor of honoring the underground, which is fantastic in theory, but in execution, it's fairly obvious that most of the guests on all three (American) volumes aren't quite ready for prime time.  For every CurrenSy (who isn't perfect, but he has a charismatic quality that most hip hop stoners lack), there's a Tabi Bonney, a Da$h, and The Cool Kids (not technically a product of the Karate School, but still).  24 Hour Karate School featured well-regarded artists such as Joell Ortiz, Jay Electronica, Jean Grae, Ras Kass (yeah, I had forgotten about that one, too), a pre-fame Wiz Khalifa, and, um, Jim Jones, who isn't a good artist but has the name-brand recognition that most of the others lack; in contrast, 24 Hour Karate School Part 2's biggest star was either Kanye West's buddy GLC or former Shady/Aftermath artist Stat Quo, depending on what side of the country you're on, and neither one of those guys is selling any records.  Shit, Stat Quo is still best known for the label he was dropped from and not any of his actual musical output: that's never a good sign.

The biggest star on 24 Hour Karate School Presents Twilight is Mac Miller, a young upstart with MTV backing (and merchandising provided by Hot Topic) who is popular with his growing fanbase.  As Miller's debut album, Blue Slide Park, isn't known for its lyricism (the guy only seems to write about partying, chicks, and smoking weed, which apparently is enough these days), it would appear that his cameo is the result of a marketing meeting at Ski's label, where his business partner Dame Dash pretty much demanded that he put someone on the album that could move units (Mac Miller debuted at number one on the Billboard charts the week Blue Slide Park was released).  As you can see, Ski is painting himself into a corner: he wants to appeal to the underground demographic, the backpackers who appreciate hard beats and intricate, battle-ready lyricism that still manages to spread a message, but his scope doesn't seem to be as wide as it used to be, and he's limiting himself to working with only close colleagues.  Which is fine, but since Ski virtually disappeared from the rap game completely (only pitching in with co-production credits here or there on albums that weren't from Camp Lo) before his miraculous resurrection a few years ago, I think that it's important for him to maintain the goodwill he's generated as of late, what with his work on Curren$y's Pilot Talk series and the 24 Hour Karate School collective itself, which proved that he was capable of more than just the 1970s blaxploitation sound of Camp Lo and the backdrops to accompany the early crime parables of Jay-Z.

To that end, what follows is a list of suggested artists Ski Beatz should reach out to in an effort to make the hip hop audience pay attention to the inevitable fourth chapter in the series.  The artists or groups aren't presented in any particular order, and by no means is this an exhaustive list, so I encourage you two to leave your suggestions in the comments below.

1.  TALIB KWELI

Look, Ski's not getting Mos Def back in the booth.  That's never going to happen.  And if I had recorded several songs with Mos Def, released a few of them to blogs as a method of self-promotion, and then found out that he wanted nothing to do with my project, then I probably wouldn't want to work with him, either.  But that doesn't mean that Ski shouldn't try to work with Dante's Black Star partner Talib Kweli.  After coming across as awkward on his earlier efforts, Kweli has, admirably, become one of hip hop's more consistent-sounding artists, but his ear for beats has had mixed success.  Working alongside Ski Beatz and his live band may help both men achieve whatever goal they respectively have in this here rap game.  Also, considering the fact that Ski contributed a beat to Kweli's Gutter Rainbows, this idea isn't all that farfetched.

2.  SLAUGHTERHOUSE (YES, EVEN JOE BUDDEN)

Ski has already worked with Joell Ortiz, so it should be relatively easy for him to convince the rest of the hip hop supergroup Slaughterhouse to show up at the dojo one day.  While writing the introductory paragraphs today's post, I was listening to 24 Hour Karate School's "Prowler 2", mostly to erase the memory of Twilight from my mind, and I truly believe that Crooked I, Royce Da 5'9", Joell, and Joey B. could absolutely destroy a bluesy-rock-tinged banger of a beat like that.  (This may be harder to accomplish now that Ski doesn't sample anymore, but it's still possible.)  If Slaughterhouse isn't available, I would also accept Cormega's newly-formed M.A.R.S. supergroup, since I believe that Mega Montana, Action Bronson, and Saigon would do Ski's beats justice.  However, this would require me to acknowledge Roc Marciano's existence, which is, admittedly, difficult.

3.  ASHER ROTH

Okay, hear me out: after sinking about as low as he could go with his debut album, Asleep In The Bread Aisle, former Great White Hype Asher Roth has been hustling, releasing mixtapes and recording cameos alongside some of the underground's elite, so it may be the right time for him to reintroduce himself to the public over a Ski concoction of some sort.  Roth's lyrics tend to stay in partying/girls/smoking weed territory, but he mixes it up with a sense of humor and an actual flow, which is much more than absolutely anyone can say about Mac fucking Miller. 

4.  U-GOD

Not only would an appearance from Golden Arms guarantee a purchase from all of the Wu stans that remain in the world (there are about twelve of us now, and we meet during the fourth weekend of every September for the annual conference on a Staten Island ferry), it could also help U-God's career, which doesn't really seem to be going anywhere these days.  Hell, even Inspectah Deck is making moves; those moves may only include walking from the couch to the fridge and back, but he's still being more productive than U-God.  Everyone else in the Wu-Tang Clan will be too busy to pop by (even Masta Killa, probably), but U-God's flow could work wonders over one of the jazzier beats in Ski's computer.  Besides, how can it be called 24 Hour Karate School and not have included any Wu-Tang affiliates as of yet?

5.  RICK ROSS

Ski's go-to guy Stalley is already a member of Ross's Maybach Music Group, so getting both of them together to record a collaboration should be the first thing on Ski's to-do list.  Besides, Officer Ricky is something of a phenomenon in our chosen genre these days: everything he touches seems to turn into gold, or at least earns tons of spins on rap radio.  If Ski wants to gain enough exposure so that the fifth installment of his series can feature nothing but unknown artists he picked up on the subway on the way into work, he needs to actually make money, and Ross is, sadly, one of the best ways to do it.  As is the next guy on the list...

6.  DRAKE

I don't want this to turn into some mainstream bullshit, but the point of this list was to point out some artists that Ski could look to in order to move some units and gain some free exposure for the as-yet-unannounced 24 Hour Karate School Part 4: The Dream Master.  Aubrey tends to traffic in slower, more abstract instrumentals anyway, so he may actually be a pretty good fit for the concept.  Hell, throw him on the song with Stalley and Rick Ross that I just made up in my mind and watch that shit blow up on Hot 97.

7.  BAHAMADIA

24 Hour Karate School featured Jean Grae, but each successive installment has lacked in the "female emcee" category.  And since I really don't want to ever see Nicki Minaj appear on a Ski Beatz album, I believe that Bahamadia is the obvious choice (if Grae herself isn't available).  Ski co-produced a track on her debut, Kollage, so he may still have her phone number somewhere.  I also feel that she is due for a comeback, and her monotone flow would clash beautifully with Ski's musical backdrops.

8.  SUAVE LOVER AND DJ CHUBBY CHUB, THE OTHER TWO GUYS FROM ORIGINAL FLAVOR

This could be a nice throwback to the old days, back when Ski Beatz was both a producer and a rapper in Original Flavor.  These guys are resigned to the trivia bin these days, as their second album Beyond Flavor is better known for featuring some of the earliest appearances from Jay-Z and Sauce Money.  There are many producers in our chosen genre who feel the need to pick up the mic from time to time, such as Black Milk, The Alchemist, and Hi-Tek, so it wouldn't be unheard of if Ski paid homage to his own past by spitting a single verse.  This collaboration would receive a ton of virtual ink on hip hop blogs, guaranteed.  I don't expect this one to actually happen, but it's a nice idea.

9.  TASH (OF THA ALKAHOLIKS)

This is more of a dream request than anything else, but Tash is one of my favorite underappreciated rappers, and his elastic flow could fit over one of Ski's more high-energy beats like a glove.  Hell, throw J-Ro and E-Swift on there too, if you want: I'd love to hear a reunion from Tha Liks.  Although he would probably have to record J-Ro's verse over Skype, since the dude lives in Sweden and all.  I also noticed that there was a lack of West Coast artists on this list, hence this entry, but even though I just acknowledged that fact, feel free to list some Cali rappers who would fit this specific bill in the comments below.

10.  JAY-Z

No, seriously.  Just call him, Ski.  You never know.  He has a daughter now, you know: he may actually be home.

-Max

HHID Turns 3: I Can Now Dress Myself

So, yeah, the blog has been around for three years today.

I can barely believe it myself. But I hope that at least a couple of you have discovered something new to listen to that you actually like.

I'm going to take a few days off to gather my thoughts. When I return, I'd like the reviews to come back at full force (as I blatantly drop hints to those who wish to contribute Reader Reviews), but until then, drop me a line to let me know what albums you want to see reviews for, or what you want to see more of on the blog in general.

Thanks for all of the comments so far, and hopefully I won't let you two down in the future.

-Max

Max Plays Matchmaker: J-Zone

Twelve artists or groups who should hit up J-Zone for a beat or two on their future projects:

(in no particular order)

Ghostface Killah
Redman
De La Soul
Skillz
Jean Grae
Chino XL
Group Home
Tim Dog
Del Tha Funkee Homosapien
Rhymefest
Twista
Asher Roth

HONORABLE MENTION:
Ol' Dirty Bastard (a posthumous remix, maybe?)

Discuss in the comments below. More write-ups coming soon.

-Max

On To The Next One...

I plan on being occupied tonight for New Year's Eve, but I should have something published tomorrow to keep you two busy.

With 2009 coming to a close, I'm left thinking that this year was actually a halfway decent one for hip hop fanatics. The music on the radio steadily becomes worse with each passing year, but the artists that actually care about their output continue to release worthy albums that kept our chosen genre alive.

Although I've mentioned in the past that I traffic in lists, I'm not going to do an official Best Of 2009 post, mainly because, due to the nature of my blog, I've only listened to a handful of 2009 releases, a mere fraction of the projects that my blogging brethren have tackled. And besides, I mostly listen to older shit anyway. But I invite the readers to list their favorite 2009 releases in the comments below.

For the record, my favorite album released in 2009 was Raekwon's Only Built 4 Cuban Linx...Pt. II, mainly because I looked forward to it for so many years that, once I finally had it in my grubby hands, I couldn't stop playing it, even though I truly believe that it pales in comparison to the original and only a handful of the tracks will stand up to the test of time. ("House Of Flying Daggers" is easily one of the best songs of this or any year, though.) However, the album I loved the most in 2009 was actually a 2008 release: Q-Tip's The Renaissance. I also dug Diamond District's In The Ruff, 7 Rings Of Saturn by The Vultures, "Intermission" (DJ Muggs featuring The Rza, Rev. William Burke, Planet Asia, and B-Real - for some reason, Prince Rakeem's line about "flying cars" does it for me), and most of the Slaughterhouse record (even some of the Joe Budden parts). There is other stuff that I liked, but I'll be damned if I can come up with album titles or song names at the moment.

For those of you who are intrigued,the album review that pissed me off the most was the one for Asher Roth's Asleep In The Bread Aisle: from the dumbass title all the way down to the weak-as-fuck songs, that project was the epitome of squandered potential.

There are a number of fourth-quarter 2009 releases that I haven't even gotten to yet, so expect a good number of My Gut Reaction posts in 2010, as I attempt to play catch-up.

Stay tuned, and be sure to leave your comments/suggestions/complaints below.

Happy New Year!

-Max

Merry Christmas!

Be sure to check back later on today, after you open your presents. There just might be an actual review to read.

-Max

Diversionary Tactics: Zzzzzzzz........

That's probably the graphic that you two expected at the beginning of the month.

Anyway, I learned something over the past sixty-one days: two months is waaaaay too long to stunt blog. When all of the music starts sounding the same, and you don't look forward to throwing another CD into the stereo, you have a problem, especially if you write a hip hop-themed blog that is all about listening to stuff and then writing about it.

I'm not quitting or anything, but it's time for a rest. So that's exactly what I'm going to do, and hopefully during my vacay, I will be able to gather some different albums that may inspire me much more than, say, fucking Rapper Noyd.

And now, a question from the audience:

Why the hell didn't you write about either Q-Tip or Ghostface Killah's new albums?

The answer is simple: major labels don't send me advance copies (yet), so any Gut Reaction pieces that appear are representative of my actual purchase of the album (unless I specifically mention otherwise). Unfortunately, to my chagrin, other shit kept getting in the way in September, so while I was able to swing Raekwon and Hova, everything else was put on the backburner. (Considering how good the Raekwon joint was, I feel I made the right choice.) I was considering reviewing the older version of Kamaal The Abstract that leaked to the Interweb almost a decade ago, but I figured that would be doing a disservice to Q-Tip, who finally convinced a label to release his jazz project. As for Ghostface, I can't say that I'm one hundred percent thrilled to listen to what is supposed to be his 'R&B' album, but as a Wu stan, it's a given that I will get to it soon.

Thanks for sticking around for the past two months. Drop me a line if you enjoyed the stunt and want to see something similar happen in the future (nothing before 2010, though: this shit took a lot out of me), or if you have any other suggestions for albums or artists that I should cover.

In the meantime, here's a link to the September posts, in case you missed any. And for completion's sake, here's the link to the August posts, as well. Tell your friends, and be sure to leave some comments.

I'll be back in a bit.

Love,

Max

PS. If you have a submission for the next Reader Review series, you can still send them to the e-mail address in the top right. Truth be told, when I pick this back up, I'll probably be running those with more regularity until I get back up to speed, so...

Diversionary Tactics: Um...

To my two devoted readers:

You were probably expecting a graphic depicting how tired I am to tie up August's month of stunt blogging. Common sense dictates that I should take a brief rest, but I won't let that bastard win this time around.

You see, I'm extending this stunt by an additional month. That's right: thirty more days of album write-ups guaranteed to make your work day seem to be about twenty to thirty minutes shorter than usual.

Why subject myself to even more abuse? I've narrowed it down to three reasons, which I'll list below:

1. There are several albums that I meant to write about in August, but despite my best intentions, shit kept getting in the way (namely, other albums). In an effort to force my own hand, I'm going to go an additional month. As an added bonus, I may finally get to clear my iTunes playlist of some of these discs that have been sitting there since the day the blog started.

2. The number of comments have been severely lacking. You dictate what happens with the blog, folks, and the only way I can tell if something is clicking is if you let me know. You can leave a note under a post, or you can send me an e-mail (those of you who have sent me messages, I read them all and appreciate them), but for right now, the only thing I can tell you two may actually like is the fact that the posts were back-to-back. So, once again, I ask of you: if you have any requests for album reviews or things you'd like to see, you kind of have to tell me.

3. I've only received a handful of Reader Reviews. As you are aware, these were supposed to run in September after the stunt was over, but the few I've received (which are varied and, one of them anyway, was pretty surprising) aren't nearly enough to provide me with any sort of break. So you basically have an additional month to get something to me. I realize this will be a lot tougher for those of you who are going back to school in September, but if you want to see your own opinions published on a blog that has a pretty decent cult following, hit me up at the e-mail address located in the top right of the page.

If you were unable to follow all thirty-one of the posts in August, here's a handy link to every single one. Be sure to tell your friends, Twitter about the blog, whatever it is you do to get the word out, as your input and enthusiasm directly affects what happens with Hip Hop Isn't Dead.

Thanks in advance,
Max

P.S. Here's a video clip for a track taken from one of the albums that will receive a Gut Reaction treatment in September, as long as the guy's album actually fucking drops this time. This is just the shit, and it's also blatantly violent, so you probably shouldn't let the kiddos watch.

An Extraordinarily Brief Commentary On Flo Rida's "Sugar", Featuring Wynter Gordon

While you two are waiting to see what the first post will be in August, I'm going to address something that I'm (admittedly) incredibly late in discussing. Flo Rida's second single from R.O.O.T.S., "Sugar", is still a relatively huge hit in the clubs, as I witnessed over the weekend. (I'd include a link to its official video, but I really don't want to encourage that kind of behavior.) While I have a relatively low opinion of this song in general, I can't fault Flo for creating radio-friendly hits one right after another.

But I can fault his producer, DJ Montay.

The track itself features female vocalist Wynter Gordon (who you will never hear from again, except for maybe on the next Flo Rida album) re-doing the hook from Eiffel 65's trashy Euro-dance hit "Blue (Da Ba Dee)" from ten fucking years ago. Back in 1999, I thought the song sucked, and in hearing this today, I'm concerned for today's youth, as they're being exposed to this garbage without any sort of context.

However, when I first heard "Sugar", another song entered my mind, one that is much better. Wynter Gordon really only rips off the title, which is probably why I haven't read anybody else draw the following comparison, but Flo's song features a simile that wouldn't pop in anybody's mind unless thay were familiar with Echo & The Bunnymen.

That song is the shit. So if Flo Rida inadvertently drives his many fans into the waiting arms of Ian McCulloch and company, I suppose I can't really be angry.

If, however, Flo's followers look for this shit on iTunes, then I would prepare myself for the inevitable zombie onslaught.

-Max

Stay Tuned...

Okay, yesterday's Reader Review will be the last one for a while. I've essentially cleared out all of the submissions I've received so far (with the exception of a couple, which I'm still waiting for responses and revisions for), so I'm asking my readers for some of your own fresh insights into some of your favorite hip hop albums. Round Four has just opened up, so reserve your spot now by shooting me an e-mail at the address in the top right. They may not be published immediately, but they will appear on the blog.

The reason they won't be published immediately is because August will be yet another stunt blog month for Hip Hop Isn't Dead. I meant to turn July into such a month, but I figured that it would be better for me to actually publish the reviews I asked for prior to May's write-ups, so I pushed it back a bit.

So, you two are charged with helping me create some content for the blog for after August, when I'll probably be extremely tired and will want to give up on rap music for a while. I look forward to reading your views, whether they be for something I already wrote about or an album I've never touched.

Be sure to tell your friends. And leave comments! Your feedback helps determine the shape and future of HHID.

-Max

Diversionary Tactics: Exhaustion Edition

The stunt blogging is over for a while. Give me a few days to rest up, and I'll get the blog back to its regularly scheduled programming.

Here's a link to all thirty-one posts, so that you have something to look at while you're patiently waiting. And be sure to leave some comments: the future of the stunt blog is dependent on the level of interest it attracts. Also, I'm confused as to how my two readers can frequently complain that I "only" write about mainstream artists and should branch out more, but when I do, the post that still receives the most attention is Eminem's. I realize Relapse was the most anticipated album of 2009 so far, but seriously?

The Reader Reviews, which have not fallen by the wayside, as you may have feared, will also continue when I return. In fact, I'm going to open it up a bit more: if you have an album that you want to write about, send me your submission at the email on the right. There is no deadline this time, so you can take your time. However, you have to defend your choice as being one of the reasons that hip hop is not dead, and you have to attach a nickname that you wish to be called, so that you can be given proper credit. Without that, I'm going to start making shit up.

Oh, and since I received a couple of comments stating that I reviewed the Eminem album "too early" (really?), I wanted to address them: Hi! Thanks for reading. You may be new to the site, and I'm glad to have you. If you'll notice, I categorized the Relapse review as "My Gut Reaction", meaning that those were my thoughts while I was listening to the album for the very first time, as opposed to the usual reviews for albums I've had for a while. I appreciate everyone's opinions and commentary, but it is waaaay too soon to tell if that album will stand up to the test of time, especially since it's been out for less than a month.

Anyway, I have to go to sleep. See you in a few days. And in case you haven't noticed, you can also follow the blog on Twitter, although I can't guarantee anything other than occasional video posts and random commentary on stupid stuff.

-Max

Diversionary Tactics: Three Things

Three things:

- Hip Hop Connection, the magazine that briefly featured Hip Hop Isn't Dead in their 2008 Blog World Cup, is starting up a digital magazine, one that has actually been up since yesterday, but better late than never. Be sure to check them out when you get the chance.

- I'm extremely disappointed with Eminem's "We Made You". (I haven't even bothered with the video, so please don't ask.) It would be one thing if his song actually discussed the idea of celebrities only being famous because we as a viewing public choose to pay attention to them, but instead, Marshall turns the shit into a typical first single, referencing multiple celebrities that will probably barely acknowledge his existence. (Ellen DeGeneres? Really?) The funny thing is, this isn't even the first single: has everyone already forgotten that "Crack A Bottle" shit? Relapse is 0 for 2 in my book: hopefully his rumored DJ Premier-produced track will be worth the price of admission. But I doubt it.

- Readers who are so inclined still have until April 18 to submit a Reader Review. The selections I've gotten so far are pretty interesting, but you still have a couple of days to top them. Hit me at the e-mail addy on the right if you have something to tell the other two readers.

-Max

Today's Not-So-Random Song Accompanied By Minimal Commentary: Foreigner - "Cold As Ice"

To celebrate Good Friday, I figured now would be as good a time as ever to start a mosh pit on the blog. M.O.P.'s Warriorz, their fourth album (one which I have not yet gotten to with the reviews), was their breakthrough disc, managing to move over half a million copies worldwide (which is actually really good for a couple of guys who shout a lot). "Ante Up" was the club banger, "Follow Instructions" was my favorite joint on there, and "Cold As Ice" was the song that was a hit overseas. No, seriously.



I don't think this song ever hit it big with American audiences, probably because we tend to have musical amnesia, selectively forgetting that there are a lot of cheesy songs out there that folks happen to like, Foreigner's "Cold As Ice" being one of them. Or maybe it was a bad choice of a sample by Fizzy Womack. Who knows? All I can remember about the Mash Out Posse track is that it's hilariously vulgar.



More goofy samples and source material coming soon. Thankfully, our chosen genre is littered with ideas such as these, both good and questionable.

-Max

Today's Not-So-Random Song Accompanied By Minimal Commentary: Gary Numan - "Films"

I had originally brought this up when I wrote about Pro Tools, the most recent album from Gza/Genius, but I felt it deserved more of an emphasis. Sampling Gary Numan in hip hop isn't anything new, but the song that most people are familiar with is "Cars". "Films", a not-so-obscure-track-if-you're-a-fan, helped producer The Rza prove that he was actually cognizant of many musical genres and styles.

Here's a live version of "Films". Sorry about the shitty video quality.



Alongside Rza and Irfane Khan-Acito, whose presence is truly not necessary (they really should have just gone all the way and sampled Numan's vocals as well), Gza flows over a barely-tweaked instrumental of "Films", essentially proving that both he and his cousin (Rza, again) can actually rap over damn near anything and make it sound good. As I mentioned in my original Gut Reaction post, "Life Is A Movie" is among the best offerings from Pro Tools, which wasn't a bad album in the least.



I'm still befuddled as to how Numan failed to earn a writing credit for Gza's song, though. Then again, there is no mention of a "Films" sample anywhere within the liner notes. No matter: (almost) any hip hop track that draws more attention to new wave from te 1970s and 1980s is fine by me.

Almost. (*cough* Flo Rida *cough*)

-Max

RELATED POSTS:
Gza/Genius - Pro Tools

Today's Not-So-Random Song Accompanied By Minimal Commentary: Weezer - "Say It Ain't So"

By now, I'm sure a lot of you two have been exposed to "I Love College", the lead single from Asher Roth's debut album, Asleep In The Bread Aisle. What some of you may not be aware of is the origin of the first version of the track, which swiped elements from Weezer's "Say It Ain't So", a 1990s rock staple that, oddly, makes me want to play the first Rock Band game again. But I digress.



Since "I Love College" is slowly becoming a moderate hit, you may have noticed that the song itself sounds nothing like the Weezer track. As the story goes, Asher Roth offered up all of the publishing rights to Rivers Cuomo in an effort to clear the sample, but the Weezer frontman told him to fuck off (maybe not using those exact words, but it is fun to imagine), forcing Roth and his producers to re-tool the beat for public consumption. Here's the original version of "I Love College".



I'm not surprised that this song is popular, mainly because, as I continue to argue, there are a lot of people out there that like really shitty music. (This bit of frat-boy douchebaggery sounds like something L.F.O. might have recorded a few years ago.) However, I'm not down on Asher Paul Roth himself (yeah, I brought out the middle name) as a rapper: he's simply doing what is taught in all writer's workshops and writing what he knows. (Besides, I can't recall hearing about beer pong, keg stands, and pizza slices for a buck in a mainstream rap song since...well, ever.) The man has actually impressed me with his freestyles (and his mixtape, The Greenhouse Effect, alongside Don Cannon and DJ Drama). "I Love College" simply comes off as the radio single meant to attract a wider audience, one that may be shocked to find actual lyricism when they steal purchase Asleep In The Bread Aisle on April 21, 2009, provided that they haven't smoked themselves stupid.

Here's the retail version of the song in question.



And, for no reason, here's Weezer's "Buddy Holly", one of director Spike Jonze's finest moments.



-Max

Today's Not-So-Random Song Accompanied By Minimal Commentary: The Clash - "Straight To Hell"

Most of my two readers may already be aware of where M.I.A. jacked her swagger from for her "Paper Planes", but for the latecomers, you should give this track a spin while trying to guess when Max will finally write about MF Doom or a West Coast artist that isn't Motion Man. (Please note that this is not an actual video, so it's not a requirement for you to pay attention to the visuals.)



As an added bonus, you can also elect to hear Lily Allen's recent cover, from the War Child Heroes album.



Questions? Comments? Concerns? Suggestions? You know where they go.

Another actual post coming soon, hopefully.

-Max

An Extraordinarily Brief Commentary On Flo Rida's New Single, "Right Round" Featuring Kesha

Flo Rida's latest single, "Right Round", recently knocked Eminem's comeback song "Crack A Bottle" off of the top of the charts, a feat which is wholly unsurprising to me. I'm probably the only blogger right now that doesn't find the new Slim Shady material appealing at all, and not just because Curtis Jackson appears on the track (alongside Dr. Dre): it sounds like he's trying too hard to oversimplify the Slim Shady persona, who became popular in the first place because of his violent, deviant, and, usually, amusing lyrics, but "Crack A Bottle" is simply about hooking up with chicks. I'm hoping the rest of Relapse sounds nothing like the lead single, which, I will admit, is typical of most Marshall Mathers projects.

Anyway, back to the point of this post. Flo Rida has managed to release back-to-back-to-back hits to pop radio, which isn't altogether difficult to explain: a lot of people listen to really shitty music. (I have to admit, though, that I kind of liked his Timbaland-assisted "Elevator".) "Right Round" features a female vocalist that nobody's ever heard of named Kesha, who will be able to make a lot of money with her pitch-perfect Katy Perry impersonation for the exact length of time that Katy Perry remains relevant to pop music culture. I believe "Right Round" has struck such a chord with fans of shitty rap music because VH-1 continues to play Adam Sandler's The Wedding Singer, creating new fans for his love letter to 1980s music. That's the only way I can explain why Flo has been able to utilize such an obvious sample without having his street cred severely questioned. (Here's a link to the video, although you'd be better off not watching that and clicking on the clip below instead.)



At least it's better than trying to reinterpret "Brand New Lover".

-Max

An Extraordinarily Brief Commentary on The Lonely Island's "I'm On A Boat", Featuring T-Pain

On one hand, I'm saddened by the fact that hip hop has become such a complete fucking joke that comedians are inspired enough to come up with stuff like "I'm On A Boat", the first single from The Lonely Island, a comic trio made up of Andy Samberg, Jorma Taccone, and Akiva Schaffer. This clip made its debut on Saturday Night Live this past weekend and appears on the group's first album, Incredibad, which hits stores tomorrow.

On the other hand, this is pretty fucking funny.



The fact that this song is entirely cognizant of what is wrong with our chosen genre, and yet completely fails to convey our frustration to the masses, is pretty goddamn brilliant. Also, this has quickly become my favorite T-Pain cameo since "One More Drink" by Ludacris; one of his last lines of the track makes me laugh out loud every single time I hear it, and I've listened to this at least once.

Oddly, I actually prefer the clean version that actually aired on NBC, since Andy and company even got hip hop censorship down pat: backmasked lyrics and curse words covered up by sound effects such as swinging swords? Count me in.



There'll be more to come later this week, I'm sure.

-Max

An Extraordinarily Brief Commentary On Slim Thug's New Single, "I Run"

Here's a short post to (hopefully) tide some of you two over while I get my shit together. While driving to work, I heard a song called "I Run" by Houston-based rapper Slim Thug, who apparently has a new album coming soon (here's a link to the video, although a viewing is not necessary to understand this post), and I was both amused and appalled by his inspiration.



That shit is hood, son! Although I believe"Space Age Love Song" to be far more gully.

I'll try to put up an actual write-up by the end of the week.

-Max

Diversionary Tactics: Year-End Edition

I have no idea how that picture is supposed to relate to a year-end post; I just like the Chiluly installation at the Bellagio. It's hard not to think of Andy Garcia every time that hotel's name is mentioned, though.

Anyway, here's to the end of 2008, an incredibly random year that saw some good music, some really fucking terrible music, and an awful lot in between. We also saw the blog attempt to wander in different directions, with some success (see: the reader reviews, the stunt blogging) and about as many failures (namely, the 'Producers Guild' series, although I haven't given up on that completely, and, by the way, when the hell was the last time I wrote about 'Something Different' that wasn't hip hop?), but either way, hopefully it was moderately entertaining.

I have no idea where 2009 will take the blog, but the plan is to resuscitate some of the features that haven't cropped up as often (like the 'Drink Coasters') and introduce some new stuff, whatever those end up being. It's too soon to tell if the stunts will continue (listening to thirty full albums in thirty days is a lot more time consuming than many of you two may realize), but I'm not ruling it out, especially since some of you two seemed to like them. As for the reader reviews, keep them coming. As of this writing, I'm sitting on more than a few that are just waiting for a publishing date, so if you're interested, want to see your name in print, or are just jonesing to have anonymous readers rip your work to shreds, drop me a line. (While I plan on eventually expanding the reader review program to allow you to write about whatever the hell you want, for now if you could please limit it to albums that I've written about before, of which there are nearly three hundred to choose from, I would appreciate it.)

I also plan on writing about The Chronic, if only so those comments in the sidebar will finally cease.

Stick around, kiddos. And try not to get too drunk.

-Max