The Twelve Days of Wu-Mas 2022 - Day #1

If you're a longtime follower of the blogs, or if you're simply a very observant reader, you might have noticed that the holiday season at HHID tends to be handed over to the Wu-Tang Clan. I still consider myself a Wu stan, although the output from the primary nine/ten/eleven members of the group has dried up significantly over the years and I will admit that I've lost track of the myriad projects their affiliates of affiliates drop seemingly every week, so these year-end posts are my attempt at playing catch-up withe the group, who, as a whole, still constitute a huge percentage of space on the site. So for the next twelve days, let's chat about the Wu like we used to.

My Gut Reaction: Ghostface Killah - Killah Christmas (December 12, 2022)

Back on December 12, Ghostface Killah surprised-released Killah Christmas, a six-song EP that he was marketing as a limited-run offering, not unlike what Westside Gunn, Mach-Hommy, or even DJ Muggs have been doing for years. To that point, it was even priced according to what his peers in the industry were able to score: fifty dollars for either a digital download or a compact disc (not both), three hundred dollars for a vinyl copy (which you’d at least get a digital download code with), and even more for other variations on the same product. You read that correctly: fifty dollars for six fucking songs. While I’m all for artists believing in their own self-worth, it appears that somebody may have taken the wrong lessons away from the Once Upon a Time in Shaolin fiasco. (My copy was sent to me from a very generous benefactor, which I’m grateful for, since otherwise you two wouldn’t be reading these words until 2023 maybe – remember, the Patreon is still only $3 USD per month and helps not only to keep this project sustainable, but can also support purchases specifically for purposes such as this.)

Anyway, Killah Christmas is comprised of six tracks, two of which are actual holiday songs, so the EP’s title isn’t a misnomer derived solely from the project’s release date. Half of its songs are produced by Danny Caiazzo, who’s handled beats on Ghost’s Ghostface Killahs, Inspectah Deck’s Chamber No. 9, and his friend Remedy’s Remedy Meets Wu-Tang, the man’s finest hour as far as I’m concerned (am I talking about Remedy or Danny there? I guess you’ll have to find my write-up to figure it out), while the other half is handed over to others, so there’s isn’t going to be much in the way of a “cohesive sound” to be found here. Apart from Caiazzo, the only Wu-Tang connection to be found here comes in the form of Raekwon the Chef, which, honestly, is usually enough when it comes to a Ghostface Killah project, but there are a handful of other guests to be found on Killah Christmas, especially if one counts Santa Claus, who does pop up on one track, no bullshit, although it isn’t in the way you’d imagine.

Let’s quickly dig into Killah Christmas, as I’m sure you two have other festivities or whatnot to attend to, while hoping that this will somehow lead into a 2023 filled with all of the content Ghostface Killah’s been promising us since before the pandemic.

1. HOLIDAY SCHEMIN (FEAT. NIZZLE MAN)
The first sound you hear on Killah Christmas is the theme from the Universal Pictures logo, which you just know couldn’t have been used legally here, but whatever. The first (performing) voice you hear on “Holiday Schemin”, however, belongs to guest Nizzle Man, a rapper-slash-producer from Staten Island whose entire shtick appears to be “sounds like Travis Scott”, which isn’t a compliment. Nizzle performs an overlong hook multiple times throughout this Ray Ray Scavo production, which is some bizarre trap remix of “Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy” that isn’t awful in and of itself, but is a poor fit for the star attraction, who eventually shows up to the studio to deliver some boasts and threats in the direction of Santa Claus, who quickly becomes the victim of a home invasion on the part of our host, who seems to be playing the villain role in that fake TV movie that kicks off Scrooged. Ghostface Killah is a little worse for wear here, as though the song itself were recorded in a hurry because the man had just decided to release a holiday EP that upcoming Monday, which was only two days away. (That would help explain why the cover art looks so fucking terrible, anyway.) “Gingerbread men with the Gucci wristbands,” is a pretty intriguing visual, though, regardless of however forgettable the rest of the song plays.

2. FIGURE IT OUT
Brooklyn-based producer Danny Caiazzo is a name that’s popped up numerous times on Wu-Tang Clan-related projects as of late, and he appears to be a student of not just the culture as a whole, but of the Wu aesthetic, as his beats tend to sound pretty much like what you’d expect from someone who likely grew up as the group themselves were on the rise. (Not unlike how many of the current writers on The Simpsons are folks for whom the show was a television fixture their entire lives, who now have a vested interest in trying to make it feel like the golden age again.) “Figure It Out” doesn’t begin promisingly, as Pretty Toney kicks off the track with a bland hook, but both of his actual verses approach peak Ghost ridiculousness at times (“I’m harder than a Chinese handshake” – wait, what?). Caiazzo’s instrumental is simple in execution, but plays well to a crowd, providing enough structure to facilitate a bar-heavy exercise while not featuring so many flourishes that the spotlight is drawn away from the main event. Sadly, this likely isn’t a track I’ll ever revisit.

3. CL30
I don’t give this type of praise lightly, so lean in: Danny Caiazzo’s beat for “CL30” could have easily slid onto Supreme Clientele in a different timeline, it sounds that fucking good. As an additional bonus, the music brings out a more excitable side of Ghostface Killah, who, while not sounding like his old self because that would be physically impossible at this point, gets as close as he can to it, his boasts-n-bullshit dripping with sarcasm, menace, and, as is his way, some unexpected references that work in the moment. “CL30” is exactly what I mean when I say that Caiazzo’s production plays like someone who studied the Wu aesthetic, the soulful sample quietly amplifying the boom bap contained wherein. Pretty Tone sells the shit out of the fact that his “third grade reading level gangstas” are far smarter than you, and the rest of his shit-talk is just as entertaining to listen to, even if the imagery gets muddled at times. Not bad, Dennis.

4. SWEET VIOLENCE (BOB JAMES) (FEAT. RAEKWON)
Most likely the track any self-respecting Wu stan immediately skipped to, because how could you not want to hear the tag team of Raekwon and Ghostface Killah when presented with the opportunity? Except that the most hardcore fans probably found themselves disappointed almost immediately, as “Sweet Violence (Bob James)” is a previously-released song rechristened with an updated title. “Bob James Freestyle”, with a brief intro that doesn’t appear here so I suppose that’s another difference, dropped in November 2021 along with “I Got Soul”, two looseys that Ghostface chose to bless his fans with as a way to somehow build off of the goodwill that came from his Verzuz matchup. (Side note: exactly zero of the projects he promised that night have made their way onto any store shelf, virtual or otherwise. I’m just saying.) As you may have been tipped off because of its title, this track utilizes “Nautilus” samples throughout (because it was either this, or “Take Me to the Mardi Gras,” I guess, but our host already had plenty of experience with “Nautilus” so it would be the easier choice for him), both Ghost and Rae spitting a verse each, sounding older but otherwise not having lost even a single step. Okay, our host’s hook, which is where the “Sweet Violence” part of the song title is derived from, isn’t so hot, but the bars are entertaining as shit, especially Raekwon’s, as the man has somehow harnessed the power of his narcolepsy into a cold-as-ice flow that spits in a matter-of-fact manner, which is probably what he thinks he always sounds like, and he’s wrong, but he pulls it off here. Ghostface Killah rapping over a classic breakbeat is always going to be a must-hear in my household, and in that way this track is perfect, but in another, more frustrating way, you’ve probably already heard this one, so in no way is Killah Christmas an “all-new” collection. (And where is “I Got Soul”, anyway? You might as well have thrown that on here, too, Dennis.)

5. MURDER MURDER MERRY X-MAS
Ghostface Killah delivers not one, but two seasonal efforts on Killah Christmas, with “Murder Murder Merry X-Mas” being the more obviously violent of the duo. Danny Caiazzo’s instrumental is more methodical and sinister, which befits the subject matter if not the holiday, and our host responds in kind, his threats delivered in a lower-register growl (except when he’s directly quoting Nice & Smooth, anyway). Entirely nonsensical as a song, but I’ve heard much worse from the guy, so I can’t really be upset with this. Still don’t have all that much to say about it, however.

6. THE CLEAN UP(FEAT. BILLY SKI-MASK & REEK DA VILLAIN)
The grand finale of Killah Christmas is the S.C.-produced “The Clean Up” (which is also known as “Chirp” online), which fails to sonically connect with the rest of the EP thanks to its synth-heavy build. It also doesn’t gel very well with our host: Ghostface Killah sounds tired as shit on “The Clean Up”, each and every bar not punched in, but may as well have been recorded line by line over the course of one hundred days. Starks doesn’t even seem to be remotely aware that there are other artists featured on the song, as his presence evaporates immediately following his final uttered syllable of the evening. Guests Billy Ski-Mask and Reek Da Villain (who was once a member of Busta Rhymes’s post-Flipmode squad The Conglomerate, if I’m not mistaken) share the second half of the track, each unleashing boasts-n-bullshit in a scattershot fashion, never managing to hit anything, although I will admit that Reek’s line about laughing to himself while “Y* politics with the Aryans” rubbed me the wrong way, so I guess it’s for the best that the song (and the EP) ends very shortly after that horseshit. This song was garbage, but you didn’t need me to tell you that.

THE LAST WORD: The presence of two holiday-based tracks notwithstanding, Killah Christmas winds up being a poor excuse for Ghostface Killah to throw some random tracks together as a cash grab. The biggest selling point of Killah Christmas, apart from its forced scarcity, is that the EP will never appear on streaming services, allegedly, but that isn’t enough of a reason for anybody except the most diehard of Wu collectors to actually purchase this. The limited-edition model Ghost is utilizing here exists solely to take advantage of people, because there is no way this EP is worth three hundred plus, let alone the fifty the man wants for a digital fucking copy.

That said, Google could become your BFF here, and after getting the hook-up from your plug you’ll find that a couple of the tracks here are decent enough to drive up hope for the man’s future in our chosen genre. “CL30” is a late-career gem, while “Sweet Violence (Bob James)” is the Rae and Ghost team-up we’ve been asking for since, well, ever (although the duo’s chemistry isn’t apparent during the freestyle, as they likely recorded in separate studios). Danny Caiazzo’s production is also rock solid, the best outcome for a guy who I originally felt trepidatious about while listening to Ghostface Killahs and Chamber No. 9 but who I now trust to handle, well, if not a proper Clan album, perhaps a project such as Wu-Tang Chamber Music for dolo. (That’s a good idea, actually – universe, you know what to do.) The other two beats on Killah Christmas (not counting the lengthy “Nautilus” loop, which is a bit of a cheat) are fairly meh, however, and our host’s performances on those tracks are indicative of how little he cared about the music itself.

As such, Killah Christmas is for hardcore Wu stans only, and it isn’t even worth the time it would take to locate it online. If you happen upon it by sheer luck, however, just know it isn’t a complete waste of hard drive space.

-Max

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