The fifth
album from the Czarface collective (comprised of Inspectah Deck and the
rap/producer duo 7L & Esoteric), or at least the fifth one featuring actual
rapping (so, not including First Weapon Drawn), followed the side project’s
comic book-esque narrative to its natural next step. After having collaborated
with like-minded producer-slash-rapper MF DOOM for the crossover event of 2018,
Czarface Meets Metal Face, the Czars looked to Deck’s own colleague, his fellow
Wu-Tang Clan cohort (and one-time Czarface guest-star) Ghostface Killah, for a spiritual sequel, the conveniently
named Czarface Meets Ghostface.
It’s hard to
get mad at they went to the well so early on in their lifespan when the idea is so brilliantly obvious, though.
Czarface Meets Ghostface aligns Jason “Rebel INS” Hunter and Seamus “Esoteric” Ryan with
Dennis “Ghostface Killah” Coles, a fellow comic-book nerd who borrowed at least
two of his stage names from the pages of Marvel Comics. (Ghost’s love of all
things Iron Man, which inspired both the naming his solo debut Ironman and his
misspelled nickname Tony Starks, even led to the man being invited to
contribute to the very first Iron Man movie in the Marvel Cinematic Universe,
acting in a scene opposite Robert Downey Jr. himself, although his scene was
ultimately cut.) Czarface being a super-powered antihero that somehow
represents the whims of both Deck and Eso (one that walks through life to a score
from 7L and his Czar-Keys partner Spada4), the team-up was a no-brainer, as all
three artists tend to deliver bars that are larger than life (Deck less so, but
he’s still pretty out there).
Had
Ghostface appeared on every single track on Czarface Meets Ghostface, this
could have counted as a part of that phase in his career where he exclusively
worked alongside a single producer or production team with a singular creative
vision, as this project, along with every single other Czarface album that isn’t
their debut, is handled in full by the Czar-Keys. That particular segment of
Pretty Toney’s catalog is hotly debated within hip hop circles, but with the
exception of the BADBADNOTGOOD collaboration Soul Soul, I happen to enjoy what
the man can do when forced to craft a cohesive album. The fact that this album
followed one of a similar aesthetic, Czarface Meets Metal Face, also helped
those expectations to soar amongst heads such as myself.
1. BACK AT
RINGSIDE
A rap album
intro fashioned as a promo a fake “Macho Man” Randy Savage (R.I.P.) cut to
address both Czarface and Ghostface Killah, two opponents he’s challenging to a
battle at the same time, apparently? Okay, sure. Deck and Eso are missed here
(at least the Rebel INS pops up toward the end via the deployment of a vocal
sample), but the musical backing draws you into the madness at play. This
better not suck, guys.
2. FACE OFF
Fascinatingly,
our hosts eschew the concept of a hard-hitting opening song to grab the
audience’s attention (see: any other Czarface project), instead choosing a
slow-rolling boom bap-lite and trusting that the listener will follow them. The
gambit ultimately works, as “Face Off” is a monster: INS and (especially)
Esoteric lyrically decimate their surroundings, while Ghostface Killah, who
kicks off the track, helps to quickly establish the stakes involved on Czarface Meets Ghostface by sounding like a slightly older version of the same dude who
once rocked a giant fucking eagle on a bracelet just because he was motherfucking
Tony Starks. 7L and Spada4’s instrumental sneaks up on the listener: at times
you aren’t even aware of any music playing (thanks to the lyrical prowess of
our hosts), but when the notes hit you in the face, you’re in the zone. This
shit was nice.
3. IRON CLAW
(FEAT. KENDRA MORRIS)
You can tell
Spada4 and 7L are far more comfortable with this whole Czar-Keys thing than
they were at the beginning of the Czarface era, as they allow the (banging)
beat for “Iron Claw” all the room it requires to breathe and function on its
own before anyone even raps over it. Sure, the voice of guest crooner Kendra Morris is heard, but she only repeats a single line in a robotic fashion, which is the perfect touch for the track, and her contribution works too
fucking well. (Her one line will be stuck in my head for days.) Both halves of
Czarface bookend “Iron Claw”, with Deck opening and Eso batting cleanup with
pretty damn funny verbal darts (“Your future looking bleak like you tryin’ to
be Jay’s friend” made me spit up my drink), while Pretty Toney’s middle verse,
hampered by some questionable studio trickery with his vocals, still manages to
win the audience over with hilarious imagery (“Got garlic for vampires and fake
n----s who came to gossip”). There’s little wonder why “Iron Claw” was selected
as Czarface Meets Ghostface’s first single.
4. CZARRCADE
‘87
I see
Ghostface couldn’t commit to an entire project where he was merely a co-star in
2019, as he’s nowhere to be found on “Czarrcade ‘87”, a song title that’s a bit
of a reach. The instrumental combines a psychedelic guitar riff with some hard drums,
which worked for me, but Deck and Eso sound too similar to one another here for
this ever to be truly engaging. They needed Pretty Toney’s voice to bounce off
of: instead, “Czarrcade ‘87” winds up being an exercise in effortless
shit-talking, but with no actual purpose. Czarface have been doing this long
enough to not have to prove anything to anyone, but this song proves that not
everything Deck and Eso touch is underground gold.
5. POWERS
AND STUFF
Wow. I
honestly and truly hated this song. Aside from a few enjoyable lines (“Word on
the street’s that the god you pray to and kneel to is an Esoteric clone”;
Ghost’s sly promoting of his Wu-Goo CBD oil), “Powers and Stuff” kind of
sucked. The beat is sparse, but not enjoyably so: I powered through this track
thinking the music was still awaiting completion scheduled for a later date.
The chorus was ass, and yes, I know, hearing children shout the names
“Czarface!” and “Ghostface!” should be cute, but it grated on my nerves here,
as did Inspectah Deck’s asinine verse. Everything about “Powers and Stuff”
sounded as half-assed as its song title. Ugh.
6. MASKED
SUPERSTARS
A missed
opportunity, in that Ghostface Killah, who famously entered the rap game wearing
a mask everywhere he went (for either mythology or legal reasons, it’s hard to
keep track these days), does not appear on “Masked Superstars”, but this was
still a successful course-correction for Deck and Eso, both of whom return to
form over a banging Czar-Keys instrumental that is right in their respective
wheelhouses. Punchline bars rule the day on Czarface Meets Ghostface, Seamus
managing to run the table (although the Rebel INS certainly gives it his all),
dropping references to comic book villains, The RZA and Prince Paul, and
chiding fake rappers with lines such as, “You can’t afford to stream the band,
nevermind drive a Tesla”, which is just funny. Not bad at all, but I thought
Pretty Toney was supposed to co-headline…?
7. MORNING
RITUAL (FEAT. KENDRA MORRIS)
The high bar
set by “Masked Superstars” is met by “Morning Ritual”, which, curiously, is
missing Deck, but at least Ghostface Killah reappears to fill the gap. The
detail Tony and Eso put into their verses, describing their respective
versions of the titular event, is kind of mesmerizing: Seamus sticks to a
storytelling rap, concerned that his “Margot Robbie-lookin’” lady friend has
robbed him, and is so hardcore that he “turned around and shot the fucking
mirror for snitching”, which, come on, that shit is funny. Ghost’s verse,
however, takes the cake: although it bizarrely edits out sexual references, his
delivery of lines such as, “I made it to the bathroom, boner all in my sweats”
and his zeal for singing in the shower hearkens back to the best tales in his
catalog (I was specifically reminded of “The Hilton” for whatever reason). The
instrumental is both sinister and playful as needed, two ideas that shouldn’t
work as well together as they do. This was hot, no lie, but Deck was missed. A
little.
8. SUPER
SOLDIER SERUM
Runs at a
slightly slower pace, but this allows Esoteric, Pretty Toney, and a
returning-from-the-store-after-buying-a-pack-of-cigarettes Inspectah Deck to
cram even more syllables into each bar, and the end result sounds pretty
fucking great. “Super Soldier Serum” presents the three emcees as the rapping
subjects of the project that created Captain America in the comics, and each
spits their boasts-n-bullshit over 7L and Spada4’s boom bap beautifully.
Ghostface takes the title fairly literally, though, at least to a degree, fashioning
himself as a superspy with a “new face” that came as a gift from Egypt, which
didn’t sound all that great given the current state of the world, but just go
with it.
9. THE KING
HEARD VOICES (FEAT. KENDRA MORRIS)
Unlike her
contribution to “Iron Claw”, Kendra Morris’s chorus for “The King Heard Voices”
(cool title, by the way) is pitchy and awful: hearing Ghostface break up the
hook by commenting about 7L and Spada4’s organ-laced instrumental is both
welcome and hilarious. Yes, Dennis, it does kind of sound like you’re “in a haunted
fucking church of something”. Ghost, along with Deck and Eso, deliver their
braggadocio like the professionals they are, with both Wu members sounding like
their younger selves behind the mic (even though INS opens his verse with a bar
that he’s used before). That hook deaded any chance of my returning to “The
King Heard Voices”, though. Too bad, guys. I did kind of like the jazzy,
free-associative feel of the instrumental interlude that ended the audio track,
though.
10. LISTEN
TO THE COLOR
A fucking
mini-masterpiece. “Listen to the Color” features four separate instrumentals,
with Deck and Eso each taking a pair for themselves. (Ghostface Killah, unsurprisingly,
is nowhere to be found.) This is just straight bars, with no hooks included to
impede progress. Inspectah Deck goes all-in on his specific brand of boasts-n-bullshit
(“Flow so dirty and unique, call it Ason”, he says at one point, shouting out
the late Ol’ Dirty Bastard), while Esoteric steals the show with lengthy
strings of punchlines that are heavy on the pop culture references and
shit-talk (although I will admit the line, “The only bright Bart (Breitbart) I
know is Simpson” is beyond corny, even though I still liked it). 7L and Spada4
also seemingly outdo themselves with every beat switch, each more moody and
distant than the last, although each one bangs. Damn, son.
11.
MONGOLIAN BEEF
Fucking
hell, so “Powers and Stuff” truly was just an off day at the office, huh?
“Mongolian Beef”, Pretty Tony’s series wrap on Czarface Meets Ghostface, is
great: 7L and Spada4 provide an instrumental that hums along beautifully, and
our hosts respond to their boom bap tendencies with some fire verses. Czarface Meets Ghostface isn’t really about anything – this was all a terrible excuse
for these guys to get together and try to out-rap one another. But I don’t care, his mom doesn’t care, do any of you care? Especially when it
sounds this fucking good? Czarface has been a godsend for Inspectah Deck,
reawakening his competitive spirit by pairing him with an equal in Esoteric,
but this specific album, putting them up against Ghostface Killah, was fucking
genius.
12. (POST
CREDITS SCENE)
Deck and
Esoteric love their comic books, so it goes without saying that they would have
a fondness for the Marvel Cinematic Universe as well. “(Post Credits Scene)” is
the final wasted opportunity of the evening, at least for me and my lofty
expectations: how fucking perfect would it have been to sneak in an uncredited
cameo from MF DOOM (which, considering Czarface Meets Metal Face, wouldn’t have
been out of left field), pairing him off with Ghostface, thereby formally
announcing a spin-off in the form of that fabled DOOMStarks collaboration we’ve
been hearing about for the past twenty-odd years? Do you think Czarface would
have purposely given up the chance to create their own extended universe? Alas, none of
that happens here (although, hopefully, not due to a lack of effort on the part
of our hosts): instead, “(Post Credits Scene)” features Esoteric and Deck
working alongside some perky boom bap, delivering the type of performances
that’ll have you wanting to hear more from these guys immediately. Eso’s
opening bar is weird, in that it seems to announce a new project and not the
ending of the current one, but hey, maybe the plan is for a director’s cut of
this very track to open whatever the Czarface boys have coming soon. Either
way, it worked for me.
THE LAST
WORD: Missed opportunities aside, Czarface Meets Ghostface is a solid effort from
everyone involved. The Czar-Keys provide constantly-evolving musical backing,
which uses boom bap as just the foundation of their sound, not the goal, and
more often than not 7L and Spada4 manage to create pieces that you didn’t
realize you needed to hear in your life until they start playing. For their
parts, Inspectah Deck, Esoteric, and Ghostface Killah do what they do best, as the
majority of this project serves as a lyrical clinic, with bars being dispensed
as casually as those loose Skittles in those shitty vending machines in the
front of most grocery stores.
There is a
small percentage of Czarface Meets Ghostface that happens to feature some of
the worst godawful bullshit this supergroup has ever committed to a hard drive,
but that was bound to happen eventually – it’s impossible for artists to
maintain their high level of competence consistently throughout the entirety of
their careers. Not every idea is going to stick. Thankfully, the good shit on
this album is so great that it distracts from the terrible stuff, so in that
sense, Czarface has done it again.
Now as for
that Czarface Cinematic Universe idea. Come on, like you two don’t want to see
a project featuring our hosts with both Ghostface and DOOM? That may be the
only way we ever get anything close to DOOMStarks, so you had better start
crossing your fingers and/or petitioning Esoteric online now.
-Max
RELATED
POSTS:
Catch up
with the Czarface saga here, and as for Ghostface Killah, well, you can imagine I’ve
spilled a lot of virtual ink about the man here.
Told you this shit was good.
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